sweet sorrow

comes a point beyond the milk feeds broken nights alphabets and sums adolescent awkwardness and teenage tempests when a parent realizes her child has become an independent self-determining persona quite unlike herself with differing tastes opinions and priorities. the fledgling seeks out his own tree. it is a natural part of growing up, the old bird tells herself, and a good thing too. she sought her own tree long ago with the same hunger. on the other side of the fierce hunger is pain. she only learns it now, on the other side.

spent

in the past three weeks:

landlord gives us notice

frantic house hunt

mega moving sale

J2's graduation

church retreat

house guests

house removal

J2 flies off

J1comes and goes

HOM's business trip

a body could do with a bit of spacing out.

house removal, cautionary tale

the final thing people don' tell you about moving to a new home:

you will be bruised all over from bumping into things in the day whilst you unpack.

you will be bruised all over from bumping into things in the night where things didn't used to be.

you will be bruised just putting out the trash because you forget the car is in the way.

journeying on

pictures up.

boxes out.

we're good to go.

house removal, epiphany

a garage and a basement are not permanent fixtures in your life. 

kids grow up and leave home. 

plan your life and acquisitions around facts like these.

house removal, insider tip 2

to minimize agony with a move: do NOT collect:

• those sturdy plastic containers that come with take-out soups and make you feel wasteful when you want to discard them. discard them.
• those pretty mugs that are given out at father's day mother's day visit-my-organization-day and end of year parties as souvenirs. say no thank you i have a cabinet full at home. also, do not buy any mug no matter how pretty. you have plenty of free mugs at home.

house removal, insider tip

when you unpack you should at all costs do as much as possible as speedily as at all possible in order not to exceed two days in total.

this is because two days is the window you have before every last muscle in your body will conspire to block all your attempts to open another box. the muscles will win.

panacea

wanted:

satisfying plot not requiring intellectual engagement wrapped in good writing to while away the evening hours of post-house-unpacking fatigue.


it's proving elusive. largely because good writing and mindless plot seldom get together.
also, the library is closed.

blessings all mine, with ten thousand beside

J1 flies over during his block leave. he quickly commandeers the car to embark upon the rabid social scene. the place quickly overruns with his paraphernalia. the music is loud and long. he does his dishes. he pulls his weight. he runs me my errands. he figures things out. he shows concern. 

as much as i hardly dare to imagine it, my son has, i think, become adult.

family reunion 101

what they don't tell you is:

• reunions are nice. we've missed each other.
• reunions are painful. they begin to end as they begin.
• once the euphoria peters off the genteel tug of war for the car keys commences.

house removal 101

• do not in a flight of fancy allow the packers to pack up all your trash bags into a box. Murphy's law prevails.
• when in doubt, toss it.
• otherwise, use the basement or the garage.
• when you have unpacked so much that your body is screaming to quit and you do, the boxes are still there the next morning.

her name is grace

i remember you registering her for first grade, HOM says to me. 

i remember a skinny teenager navigating middle school.

a limp sedated wisp in hospital. a firebrand tomboy.

a child blessed. a blessing.

goodbye lunchbag!

this has packed its final lunch.

J2 graduates high school in two days.

reeeaaally.

heart break, reloaded

seller's remorse n. when you offload too happily at the garage sale and wake up with a sinking feeling the next day. [eng. seller (of commodity) + remorse (over selling)]

specifically, we are short of a desk for the p.c. now.

heart break 2

bone tired
a li'l bit richer
just as cluttered
not understandin' why

thank God for enthusiastic young people.

heart break

we are culling years of memories, putting them up on exhibition

and attaching a price tag to them that underestimates and 

offends their true value.

we are selling our family history

and hoping that somewhere, another family may have

the same fun and joys and laughters and times that we have had.

clutter attack

do you notice that they tell you how to organize the clutter in your home but not what to do with the organized clutter years down the road?

because it may look neat, but that's only until you start to take it apart to deal with the innards. and then the temptation is to stuff them back into their fossilized order and pretend you don't have to deal with them until the kids grow up or move out or you need to downsize drastically or something. i guess after a dozen or so stuffings that something has come.

our home is slowly unraveling at the edges.

house hunted

yeah!

so we're getting compacter nicer newer cheaper, in what is shaping up to be quite a pleasant seamless move. at times like this i begin to understand why Mary broke into her Magnificat.

even to your old age, i am He

and even to gray hairs i will carry you!

i have made, and i will bear;

even i will carry, and will deliver you.

isaiah 46:4

full throttle ahead

our family is on an aggressive drive to de-clutter. my old textbooks finally get to go to the landfill. the games chest is ruthlessly emptied. even the drums find themselves a new home. we plan our yard sale for this week. HOM monitors his babies on ebay. J2 has a roaring sale preview on facebook. we get spray-painted signs from our neighbor after his sale today who got them from the other neighbor who had his do last week. very busy worker bee mode we are all in.

the only thing is, HOM and i spoil it somewhat by visiting our neighbor's moving sale and buying ourselves a new table, which means we now have to sell our old table in addition to everything else. J2 is slightly put off.

surviving a move

sayings to live by:

one bag a day.

when in doubt, throw.

you want? come and get it.

house hunters 3

the bad: no covered parking. long driveway. too much yard. long way away (from where we are). not so pretty. etc.

the good: other people's houses are just as cluttered as my own. some are more.

we continue the hunt with grim determination.