beach trip 2

hot hunk n. brawny young man with a sunburn. [f. ENGLISH hot a. of or at high temperature; colloq. hunk n. large piece]

meadow

i want to scatter wildflower seeds on our front yard to get this effect but HOM adamantly objects. i don't see why not. if we must have weeds we may as well have a say in the species that we harbor.

inescapable conclusion

the biggest obstacle in a busy grocery store must the untethered child of a free ranging parent.

there should be a limit to the amount of experiential learning a child gets to do that the community has to participate in.

rest

in my weakness neediness weariness and loss

as i scale the pinnacles or plumb the depths

when i surrender my dearest dreams hopes and plans

there comes an abiding peace.

thank God.

he who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.  - ps 91:1

outliers - malcolm gladwell (2008)

this book is crafted around several ideas:

1. right place, right time,

2. the unavoidability of hard work, and

2. the advantage of a goodly inheritance.

which, if you ask me, are not new ideas at all, and not new when applied to success. just ask any east asian. our lore is chockful of ssu ma kuang-like role models and ah q-type cautionary tales.

methinks malcolm gladwell is shaping up to be a one hit* wonder who optimistically starts a franchise.

*the tipping point is, in my opinion, rather admirably original.

beach trip

a troop of testosterones camp overnight at our home on their way to the beach. they are up before the crack of dawn to pick up the corresponding flock of estrogens.

this shows that twelve years of strident and emotionally laden morning calls on schooldays are in truth redundant. when the stakes are high enough the alarm clock suffices perfectly.

divorce & remarriage

today, on J2's recommendation, i sever my decade long association with internet explorer and hitch myself to google chrome.

this marks our third alliance from the start of the world wide web to now:
1. netscape navigator, back in the mists of time,
2. internet explorer, and now
3. google chrome.

my favorite is the latest:
1. it's quicker, and
2. it's prettier.

enchantment

i see my first fireflies. evanescent pinheads of yellow glow and dance streaks in the dusk and reflexly activate fears of retinal detachment. clearly, my worldview is driven by a biological paradigm.

i remember the princess of legend with her living coronet of fireflies. pure hogwash, before today. looking at the floating faerie lights, i can well believe it now.

rite of passage

driving home, J1 neglects to disengage the hand brake.

in all honesty, this is shaping up to be a family tradition. the only one of us who is innocent is J2, who is not old enough a driver to sin much yet.

heartache

i cull six bags of books from our shelves. our library is a treasure trove lovingly accruing over two decades, and each time i streamline it a little part of my heart shatters a teensy bit.

wheels

J1 and J2 have custody of my trusty toyota and i am left to face HOM's car.

i immediately encounter my first obstacle. my legs will not reach the gas pedal and i eventually resort to the ignominy of a booster cushion.

halfway through my errands i realize to my horror that i am running on empty. this is the result of erroneously monitoring the temperature gage instead of the fuel gage.

the man's car is not fitted out for groceries and i end up safety belting three gallons of water and a watermelon to the backseat.

i want my old rattler back. failing which i want HOM to come back from his trip and drive me around, although perhaps a smartcarfortwo may also work.

...and shakers

the movers come to pack J1's meager air shipment. one electric semi-hollow one amp some clothes and dress shoes. half the box is taken up by stuffing to stop the real stuff from sloshing about. this is the first step to his repatriation.

i shudder to think of the fate of today's shipment. when you have to tell movers not to flip electronic equipment about it does not bode well for the future.

for the record, my favorite movers are transpo asian tigers in thailand. they are by far the best trained most knowledgable and neatest guys i've met in the business.

the best is yet to be 2

souvenirs.

letting go

a teenager's unmitigated social life is a rabid animal.

a parent learning to let a teenager go lives through a roller coaster, with pride satisfaction and relief interspersed with moments of gnawing anxiety.

and yet far better that they strain to pull away than that they do not wish to, or are incapable of, ever flying off. behind my grumbles and underneath my worries, i'm thankful.

generation gap

why J2 has to provide food for two classes on the first day of final exams is beyond me, as is why HOM has to abet her midnight baking spree. back in my day, on the night before the finals, we actually studied.

the best is yet to be

what they don't tell you about graduation:
1. d.c. traffic doesn't stop for your high school graduation,
2. finding a parking space near the constitution hall is heart-stopping,
3. it's a three hour long cheering session, catcalls included, and
4. the parking fine is $25, payable by credit card.

théâtre de l'absurde

broad comedy mixed with horrific images

characters in hopeless situations

forced to do meaningless actions

dialogue full of clichés

parody of realism*

two full page advertisements in today's paper** which reiterate that life is the original tragic comic play.

*theatre of the absurd, introductory paragraph

**the washington post

passage

i pack J1 his final lunch for high school. one cheese and ham sandwich, one dessert sandwich, one fruit and some energy bars in a brown bag for four years can get insipid.

what i am grateful for is the four years which allow J1 to complete one educational phase in the same country. there are gifts that you do not believe you will be given until you hold them in your hands. this is one of them.

art of tea

HOM and J2 steep a pot of silver needle tea. they meticulously measure (76 to 85 degrees) and time (5 minutes) and wax lyrical. next they brew a pot of pu'er and discuss processing methods and aging potential. they surf the web for information on vintages and they are in search of the elusive chaqi.

i say, when you reduce a pot of tea to scientific steps, you lose the romance of thé. i lean towards sloshing on the hot water and intuiting my way to a fragrant cup myself. their way, if chaqi hits you in the gut you might think the a/c is faulty.

deepwater horizon

i will be their fierce advocate to make sure they are getting the compensation they need to get through what is going to be a difficult season.  -  obama, june 15, 2010

louisiana

alabama

florida

clean-up

loss of life

loss of earnings

unemployment benefits

criminal proceedings

civil proceedings

escrow account
$20 billion

replenishability

there is a goose who lays golden eggs, and it is important to keep her alive.

post-modernism

our mechanical clock, as a result of over zealous winding, is now four and a half hours too fast, and the gap continues to increase. this rather puts a new spin to being ahead of the times.

life happens

once earthly joy i craved, sought peace and rest; now thee alone i seek, give what is best.

let sorrow do its work, come grief and pain; sweet are thy messengers, sweet their refrain, when they can sing with me: more love, o christ, to thee.  -  e.p. prentiss

a man must first be broken i think, to:

1. consider that he will weep,

2. relinquish his torment, and to

3. seek a value to his pain, instead of vindication.

comes a time when one no longer avoids this hymn out of superstitious fear. sorrow visits the strongest fortress, but her sometime traveling companion is hope.

i am, among all, most richly blessed.  -  an unknown soldier
catch my tears; save them for a holy purpose. -  p.j. ellis

edge of bittersweet

HOM fiddles with electronic toys this weekend, providing technical support to J1 and C as they record their songs. J1 graduates high school in three days. HOM leaves for an extended trip the following day. in the near future, J1 begins his two year military obligation on the other side of the world.

time is finite. these days it gets difficult to forget just how much.

proof of love

places i go to with HOM, entirely out of deep devotion and commitment to our relationship:
1. home depot,
2. best buy,
3. sim lim square,
4. kelantan road, sgp.

operation desert shield

my enormous new pot. HOM does not understand what a nominal cook wants to do with a pot of this size. it's not for the food, i explain patiently. it's for the fortress-like sides when i use it as a sauté pan so that i splash out less. the menu philosophy remains the same, minimalist hodge podge.

memories

J1 and J2 horse around in the yard. on impulse, i grab the SLR and snap some shots. these are our first non-vacation candid photographs in five years.

we have records of special events birthdays landscape birds and flowers, but precious few of our children growing up and leaving their childhood behind.

crystal ball

rooting through anonymous shelves to see if there is a special prize for today. flipping a book from end to front, just to quickly get the gist. the ineffable thrill of lugging a bag of books of all shapes sizes and textures. seeing a particular scene on a page in my mind's eye. chatting up a stranger simply because we are both looking at the same books.

kindle. sony e-reader. iPad.

doth the bell toll for my magic pleasures?

trivial pursuit

HOM watches a youtube video that purports to teach him how to split a cake of tea leaves. his guide is sincere convicted and utterly serious.

one outcome of the web-enabled self-publishing phenomenon is the elevation of every miniscule chore into a teachable moment. pedantry without consideration or reflection is now unrestrainable.

moving house

i crawl on the highway behind a truck with an oversized load. it is an enormous wooden box painted cream, with regular openings in the long sides a pretty set of french windows at the end and a pair of porch lights flanking them. i look through the windows to peeling paint air vents and bare wires. it all looks incredibly like somebody's living room is taking a trip up the beltway.

i eventually escape from behind the truck and zoom ahead to find a partner truck hauling an enormous wooden box painted cream, with regular openings in the long sides and a sliding door at the end. perhaps this is his kitchen.

faith

is not suspension of belief.
it is believing in spite of.

psalm 23

when i am drained and vulnerable and in danger from threats i do not know and will face challenges i cannot foresee, he protects me and allows me to rest and regain my strength. when my emotions are roiled in doubt diappointment shame and guilt he brings me back to peace and to a new wholeness because he accepts me. he helps me to be faithful against all my natural tendencies, because my being faithful matters to him. when i face the loss of my hopes and dreams he is there with me, and he bids me not to fear the uncertainty of losing what i treasure.

he gives me more than i need. when i am weakest and most tempted he affirms me with good things. i remember kind words friendships fellowship and smooth paths forgiveness open doors and answered pleas laughter health and cheer. he considers me worthy of his investment of time and blessing and he promises that there will be more good things to come.

he will ensure that i will have his best care as i follow him, and he promises me his help in my every situation even when i do not deserve it. and when all is done, he promises that i will go home to him.

gender bias

why is it that when a modern academic article discusses a hypothetical human this human is always a she?

i ♥ my auto mechanic

in the way i should ♥ my health care provider, but am unable to do.

i turn up without an appointment and he sees me. i tell him my problem and he runs a diagnostic test. at no charge. he gives an estimate of cost and waiting time. he does the job the same day. he keeps to his cost and time estimate. my car runs and the awful screech is gone. he is friendly but to the point and he spares me the small talk. additionally he works on weekends and he is open at seven in the morning. i can afford him without insurance.

to repeat, i ♥ my auto mechanic.

timeline

between the AP exams and end of the school year we have:

senior prom

post prom party

concert

graduation parties

laser tagging

rock climbing

the beach

farewell party

and, by the way:

final exams

also, incidentally:

graduation

washer & dryer

we know these can survive the above:
money bills.
ipod nano.

now we are wondering about:
J2's multigig thumbdrive.

some accidents are expensive.

weather competition

snowiest winter
second warmest spring

what's next? hottest summer? wettest fall? gustiest hurricanes?

jeremiad

courtesy of our weekly sunday engagement with the book of jeremiah, here is a summary:

national rebukes
promises (31-33)
imprisonments (36-38)
national disintegration
global rebukes

52 chapters built upon the central difficulty of discerning one true voice as history unfolds in a cacophony of louder messages around us.

deeper, deeper (hgp #337)

today's closing hymn, which goes to show that you can spend years flipping through the hymnal and still be (pleasantly) surprised one day by an absolutely unfamiliar selection.

iLike

i visit the apple store in HOM's sneaky attempt at proselytization. i am converted. from the ashes of a lifelong hardened luddite rises a new apple acolyte with a special fixation on the iPad.

i'll tell you this. the iPad. is sexy.

diversity 4

J2 sits an SAT subject test today. she applies herself with faithful diligence up to the final moments. a year ago J1, exiting the house to sit the same test, asks me, er, which exam am i sitting today?

technophobic artistry

turns out, after twenty years of whining for a longer zoom, it's a macro i've been needing to get this effect. a macro with a wide aperture. never mind, i console myself. i'm clever in other ways.

good hair day

the secret to the above, i finally figure out, is a damn good haircut with plenty of hairspray.

lamentation

J2 and i have a dinner date at the embassy to meet our president, no less. this gets both of us into our most glamorous best and J2 all excited about a photo opportunity with the man himself.

unfortunately the shots turn out tragically unfocussed. it looks like the idiot proof point-and-shoot is not me proof. they need to invent a cool looking SLR type of camera that girls want to be seen with.

way to a girl's heart

HOM judges hotels by the splendidness of their rainshower. his wife, being a frivolous piece of fluff, decides on the quality of the souvenir he brings back. on this criterion, the latest hotel wins.

statecraft 2

thailand's revolving passel of prime ministers has a parallel unfolding in japan. or am i the only one who distinctly remembers thaksin and koizumi and can name none of the others after?

the going rate, it appears, is 5 in 4 years.

contrast with one asian republic, currently at 3 in 45, and holding. good politics needs to find a mean somewhere between seasickness and fossilization. some would say good politics is a platonic and epicurean pipedream.

gotchim!

i drag myself out for an afternoon walk and finally strike gold, although he is a little out of focus. but what the hey i've been lustin' after this shot for days!

history

repeats itself.

for the record

i want to photograph:
1. that little red bird,
2. the baby squirrel* in my yard,
3. storm clouds.

*before he grows up.

nice

i treat myself to a trip to borders and find myself chatting to the gently fluffy grandmotherly cashier lady. it is a wonderful relief to be able to speak with a salesperson without the barrier of an unwieldy accent limited vocabulary a generation gap or gum being chewed, and with eye contact to boot.