Thursday, October 1, 2009

journey to ithaca

the adult vacation trend is to make a pilgrimage to the ancestral village in china and fraternize with one's hitherto unknown kin.

the idea is admirable. what are we if we do not know the reticulated culture that begets us, if we do not preserve the personal humanity of our history? what legacy will we leave, if it starts two generations ago in the new country?

my response is painfully unadmirable. modern city girl who needs her amenities is not going to do well traipsing to the village with wooden houses well water chickens and dust. reserved modern city girl cringes at having to feel the love continuously at unwelcome decibels. sweepingly and totally unfairly, overseas chinese diaspora girl does not feel enthusiastic about the middle kingdom and its inhabitants.

this is uncaring and selfish. but try as i may i cannot feel much beyond instinctive revulsion when i look at people's family reunion photos. sigh.

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